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zhijie09-12-90 More than words.
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My Life Just Gets Worse
Sunday, November 16, 2008
today wokeup at 1140slept late before again. 5 am blah.. anyway met allan and miki at yck MRT stations then walked into school.. was talking about the pieces we playing for sinfonia.. inn of sixth happiness.. then later talked about the JC POLY band fest.. actually thought of going .. budden $30 per person.. abit expensive ah.. so nvm lah.. save the money .. no money liaos.. somemore i think the fest is very near philyouth concert.. ANYONE WANNA COME FOR Philyouth concert on 23rd?! haha. tix quite expensive though.. I realised.. i would have performed in all of singapore's halls by next year feb.. victoria concert hall singapore conference hall and and and.. ESPLANADE NEXT YEAR.. wooo.. dream fulfilled i guess ok enuff of the randomness. philyouth prac started.. today 3 aircon spoil again.. thanks ah NYP technicians.. u guys do ur job really well.. played through GR selections, movement for rosa, persis , blue shades then EL Camino Real.. During GR .. was super overwhelmed by the 2 bassoon girls.. so fierce.. haha they are DAMN LOUD lah.. god .. cannot even hear my self when i played today.. bleah.. i know .. im deproving alot.. whatever .. im losing my passion bah.. then rosa sucked.. persis .. ok lah.. blue shades.. errrr.. what can i say .. still got missing notes here and there cause donno how to play.. EL CAM .. super cui by then.. cause damn tired playing the other songs liaoz.. where is my FEEL.. cannot feel anything now... only can feel irritated by my own sound.. then blue shades bass clar can say quite CMI lah... now my sound so bad that i dont even dare to play loud.. is it because of the reed?? or it is just me..?.. probably me .. i F-A-I-L-E-D .. i disappoint myself again and again.. what the heck am i doing.. in the past.. no matter what happens. i'll always stand up and become better.. but now.. i just dont have the power to become better anymore.. thus im getting lousier and lousier.. day by day.. maybe i shouldnt be playing an instrument anymore.. i lost my will to become better.. |
Goodbye.
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